A fire started in a pasture near a farm in eastern North Carolina. The fire department from a nearby city was called to put out the fire. The fire proved to be more than the city fire department could handle, so someone suggested that a rural volunteer fire department be called. Though there was doubt they could be of any assistance, the call was made.
Five minutes later, the volunteer fire department arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck.
They drove straight towards the fire and stopped in the middle of the flames! The volunteer firemen all jumped off the truck and frantically started spraying water in all directions. Soon, they had snuffed out the center of the fire, breaking the blaze into two, easily controllable parts.
The farmer was incredibly impressed with the volunteer fire department's work and so grateful that his farm had been spared. The next day he presented the volunteer fire department with a check for $1000.
A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds. "That should be obvious," responded the captain. . . "The first thing we're gonna do is get the brakes fixed on that there fire truck!"
. . .
Two hunters were dragging their dead deer back to their car. Another hunter approached pulling his along too. "Hey, I don't want to tell you how to do something... but I can tell you that it's much easier if you drag the deer in the other direction. Then the antlers won't dig into the ground... After the third hunter left, the two decided to try it. A little while later one hunter said to the other, "You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier!"
"Yeah, but we're getting farther from the truck," the other added.
. . .
"Johnnie."
"Yes, teacher."
"If there are twenty sheep in a field, and one gets out through a hole in the fence, how many sheep are left in the field?"
"None, teacher."
"Johnnie, there are still nineteen sheep left in the field. Obviously you need to know your arithmetic better."
"Sorry, teacher, but I'm not wrong now, because I do know sheep!"