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Saints' Discussion Forums  |  Forums  |  Everything Else  |  Topic: A Joke a Day 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
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odhiambo
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« on: July 19, 2014, 03:11:56 PM »

A Catholic priest and a Protestant clergyman were having a heated argument over the merits of their respective faiths.
Neither would agree nor yield a point to the other.
Finally the Catholic gave it up saying:
"Very well, we must agree to differ and go our separate ways---, you to worship God in your way and me to worship Him in His"
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Inspirational Quotes from the saints:
'If men but knew Thee, O my God!'
St. Ignatius of Loyola
“Late have I loved Thee,
 O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
 late have I loved Thee!......”
St. Augustine of Hippo
Shin
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« Reply #1 on: July 20, 2014, 02:57:44 AM »

Too true!!
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'Flores apparuerunt in terra nostra. . . Fulcite me floribus. (The flowers appear on the earth. . . stay me up with flowers. Sg 2:12,5)
odhiambo
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« Reply #2 on: October 10, 2014, 03:08:25 AM »

An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to get the anesthesia, he asked to speak to his son.
"Yes, Dad , what is it?"
"Don't be nervous, son; do your best, and just remember,
if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me,
your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife...."  Grin
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Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!
Inspirational Quotes from the saints:
'If men but knew Thee, O my God!'
St. Ignatius of Loyola
“Late have I loved Thee,
 O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
 late have I loved Thee!......”
St. Augustine of Hippo
Patricia
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« Reply #3 on: October 10, 2014, 10:33:35 AM »

 Grin Grin Grin
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odhiambo
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« Reply #4 on: November 11, 2014, 07:30:37 AM »

A doctor was addressing a large audience in Oxford ...........

"The material we put into our stomachs should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is full of steroids and dye. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High transfat diets can be disastrous and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and most of us have, or will eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

After several seconds of quiet, a 70-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake....!!!!"
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Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!
Inspirational Quotes from the saints:
'If men but knew Thee, O my God!'
St. Ignatius of Loyola
“Late have I loved Thee,
 O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
 late have I loved Thee!......”
St. Augustine of Hippo
Shin
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« Reply #5 on: November 13, 2014, 02:22:13 AM »

 rotfl blue rejoice

Have a goodnight Odhiambo!!
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'Flores apparuerunt in terra nostra. . . Fulcite me floribus. (The flowers appear on the earth. . . stay me up with flowers. Sg 2:12,5)
odhiambo
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« Reply #6 on: November 13, 2014, 06:07:33 AM »

rotfl blue rejoice

Have a goodnight Odhiambo!!

Night Shin!
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Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!
Inspirational Quotes from the saints:
'If men but knew Thee, O my God!'
St. Ignatius of Loyola
“Late have I loved Thee,
 O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
 late have I loved Thee!......”
St. Augustine of Hippo
odhiambo
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« Reply #7 on: November 28, 2014, 02:21:56 AM »



Subject: True sign in a window store in Scotland.


SIGN IN A STORE WINDOW:

'WE WOULD RATHER DO BUSINESS WITH 1000 AL  QAEDA TERRORISTS THAN WITH ONE
SINGLE BRITISH SOLDIER!'

This sign was prominently displayed in the window of a business in
CAMPBELTOWN , SCOTLAND .

You are probably outraged at the thought of such an inflammatory statement.
However, we are a society which holds Freedom of Speech as perhaps our
greatest liberty.
After all, it is ONLY A SIGN.
You may say, “ What kind of business would dare to post such a sign?”

Answer:

A FUNERAL PARLOUR


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Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!
Inspirational Quotes from the saints:
'If men but knew Thee, O my God!'
St. Ignatius of Loyola
“Late have I loved Thee,
 O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
 late have I loved Thee!......”
St. Augustine of Hippo
Shin
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« Reply #8 on: November 28, 2014, 11:45:37 AM »

 rotfl blue rejoice happy roll rotfl

That was a great laugh odhiambo!
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'Flores apparuerunt in terra nostra. . . Fulcite me floribus. (The flowers appear on the earth. . . stay me up with flowers. Sg 2:12,5)
odhiambo
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« Reply #9 on: November 29, 2014, 05:51:48 AM »

 Grin
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Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!
Inspirational Quotes from the saints:
'If men but knew Thee, O my God!'
St. Ignatius of Loyola
“Late have I loved Thee,
 O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
 late have I loved Thee!......”
St. Augustine of Hippo
Neopelagianus
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« Reply #10 on: December 09, 2014, 11:20:04 AM »

Funny, especially the first and the last one  rotfl blue rotfl blue rotfl blue

N.
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odhiambo
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« Reply #11 on: December 10, 2014, 12:09:53 AM »

Fishing?
 
The rain was pouring and there was a big puddle 
in front of the pub.
 
A ragged old man was standing there with a rod 
and hanging a string into the puddle.
 
 A tipsy-looking, curious gentleman came over to 
him and asked what he was doing.
 
 'Fishing,' the old man said simply.
 
 'Poor old fool,'  the gentleman thought and he 
invited the ragged old man to a drink in the pub.
 
 As he felt he should start some conversation 
while they were sipping their whisky,
 
 The gentleman asked, ‘And how many have you caught?'
 
 'You're the eighth,' the old man answered.
 Grin
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Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!
Inspirational Quotes from the saints:
'If men but knew Thee, O my God!'
St. Ignatius of Loyola
“Late have I loved Thee,
 O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
 late have I loved Thee!......”
St. Augustine of Hippo
Shin
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« Reply #12 on: December 10, 2014, 12:39:25 AM »

That one's rather heartwarming!  Cheesy

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'Flores apparuerunt in terra nostra. . . Fulcite me floribus. (The flowers appear on the earth. . . stay me up with flowers. Sg 2:12,5)
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