Spiritual trials.

[MarysLittleFlower]

Hi everyone.. I'm sorry about the personal nature of this post. I'm really not sure where to ask this...... I'm going to really try and speak to my priest, but I'm afraid it would take me an hour to explain and I don't know how to approach him about this!! I'll really try though. But I need to talk about this..... I hope that's alright!! I get the impression there are people here on this forum who are really well-read in the lives of the Saints, theology, etc, and maybe something in my story would remind you of something you read....

Over the past few months, I've been going through severe spiritual trials. I'm not diagnosed with any psychological disorders... and this only happens to me with spiritual things. I've been going through many temptations, etc. But there's another thing that is very difficult for me to deal with.. it seems almost too much for me to bear.

There are two ways that I tend to experience God's presence, when it happens. One of them I believe to be Him, the other, I'm not so sure. Sometimes, I feel Jesus' presence and I recognize Him as Jesus, and I feel a lot of love, peace, joy - all the fruits of the Holy Spirit.. it has good effects on me, afterwards I find it easy to be charitable to others, to pray, - it opens my heart to God and helps me to love Him... He gives many graces through this. Sometimes even during the time of great temptation, Jesus would let me feel His presence very powerfully and He would heal my heart.

The other way.. I don't know what this is. I sometimes feel a "presence", that feels EXACTLY like Jesus. It even communicates to me, directly to my mind, that it IS Jesus. But the presence is not so gentle and loving... but neither is it angry... I just get a sense of power. That seems alright but there are three very odd things about it. One, the presence seems to force itself on me, it's almost like something pushing into my mind..my mind feels oppressed, yet there is also great clarity and a "knowledge" that this is God and Jesus. hmm... but also, the "fruits" are not so good. When I believe that it is Jesus, and turn to it, and open myself to it, - I am filled with a great interior anxiety and unrest. And also, sometimes it tells me things I can't understand. But it feels EXACTLY like Jesus, and the clarity of that feeling is unexplainable... SO clear, SO obvious, yet so unlike Him in other ways.

I've decided it's either a demon posing as Jesus, or it's Jesus testing me, or it's really Jesus but I'm for some reason unable to experience Him properly and am filled with anxiety rather than peace. I read in St John of the Cross, that the "dark night" is when God gives the soul more light than it can bear, and it experiences the light as darkness and feels absolutely rejected by God. This has actually happened to me a few times but at the same time I also felt great love for God, and a great longing for Him... with this strange oppressive experience though, - I feel no love at all. Afterwards I feel anxiety, and then nothing.

This happened many times and in different situations.. and sadly, each of the theories is supported by something. Maybe it would help if I listed them...

1. First time.. the night I became Catholic.  I received the Eucharist for the first time in the Church... and instead of feeling Jesus' presence and peace, I felt great anxiety. It lasted the whole night, and then I felt that "presence", which told me (more like shouted at me) that I'm going to hell for SURE because I became Catholic, when God really wants me to be Orthodox. (I was baptized Orthodox as a child and choosing between the two churches was a very difficult process for me.) Well I was ready to go and become Orthodox the next day.... but I held on, for some reason. Instead, in the morning, I went to the Catholic church and spoke to the priest at Confession, and then received the Eucharist one more time. This time it was completely different though!!!! I felt such incredible peace and consolation, and real union with God... I also felt that I did the right thing in becoming Catholic.... I felt Jesus' love very strongly that whole day and He gave me many graces - though I was still very sinful.  I've never been able to figure out why these two contrasting experiences happened in this way.

2. I felt this oppressive presence again telling me that I'm going to hell for being Catholic, and then I felt so horrible, like it was getting into my mind, and almost like I'll be dragged to hell right then and there. I prayed and nothing helped. It felt like this was God's will. But then I put the Rosary around my neck, and everything ceased.

3. I felt this presence all around me, it told me it was God (and felt like Him too), but I felt rejected by God... I felt like I had committed the unforgiveable sin. I asked God if I did, and heard a loud, clear, "YES" from this presence. I got a clear impression that God is just but not merciful, and my strength was failing already. I then cried for half an hour because of this and begged Mary to help me. She suddenly filled me with incredible consolation and I felt Jesus tell me I hadn't committed the unforgiveable sin, I felt great love coming from Him and a lot of joy.. I spent the rest of the evening praising God for this.

4. A couple times, I felt this same anxiety after Communion... or in church.... I didn't feel any "presence" apart from Jesus in the Eucharist, but His presence for some reason filled me with great internal anxiety and unrest. But soon after, it would go away and I would feel His peace and consolation again.

5. Today. I felt a lot of doubt again if I should be Catholic or Orthodox. I felt several times that I should be Orthodox, and I felt this strongly. But when I decided to trust in Jesus and in His goodness, I felt peace and then got the impression that I should be Catholic. I was confused... and then, I felt this presence again very clearly, it told me it's Jesus, and it felt *completely* like Him... the more I asked, the more surely I felt this, there was no doubt in my mind... the communication to my mind that "this is Jesus" was VERY strong. But I felt this inner anxiety before it appeared, during, and for a long time afterwards. It told me I must become Orthodox and this is God's will for me; that I made a mistake in becoming Catholic. I couldn't argue against it cause it was so evidently God - I could recognize Him... and so I said 'yes'... but I felt this great worry. I didn't receive any graces, I felt no love.. I felt like my mind was being oppressed, but the impression had *great clarity* to it, - there was no confusion at all but great inner unrest!! Even after the whole thing, I once again told God that I want His will to be done, - but this gave me no peace. Only now has the anxiety faded..after a couple hours. But I no longer feel that I should be Orthodox...Im just back to the way I was before.

While this was happening, I tried everything to discern... I tried to submit myself to God's will, I asked the "presence" to repeat something like "blessed be Jesus and Mary", I asked it if it was the same Jesus who is the Son of God, became a Man, died on the Cross and rose from the dead in 3 days. I didn't feel it repeat these things though... but it wasn't a voice so I don't know if it was supposed to, or how.

I don't really know what I'm expecting from this thread, I don't feel like anyone can know for sure what is going on with me, but I have no idea what to do now. If it was Jesus, then I should become Orthodox... but how can it be Him? I'm SO lost... I felt in my heart that it is Him, I recognized Him, there was a sense of great clarity, I also felt a very strong sense *this is the truth*.... however, at the same time, I felt such great inner unrest... if it's a demon, why would the same thing happen after Communion? If it's Jesus, why would I feel anxiety, and why would He tell me I did the unforgiveable sin when I hadn't? and why would the feeling of His presence be so oppressive, almost like something forcing itself into my mind? I even felt a strange tingling sensation on my head but it wasn't pleasant or nice at all, but like something was communicating its presence right to my mind. That's not like my other experiences of Jesus.. I always thought that Jesus is kind and gentle.. Is He just testing me? Or am I sometimes unable to experience Him properly and so I get this instead? if it's not Jesus, why do I feel so strongly that it is?

I don't understand why He would do this to me, this is more than I can bear right now. I still trust in His goodness, I still love Him, and I still believe in Him. If this is how Jesus is, then He's still my Jesus. If all this is my fault, I hope He forgives me. If this is a demon, I wish He would just show me so I wouldn't be deceived like this.

If you have any thoughts or advice please share them with me.. but if not, I would really appreciate any prayers. I want to speak to a priest but I don't know how to describe all this.. I could barely describe it here. I'll try though. ...I'm sorry this got so long!!!! I'm also sorry this is all so weird. God can do anything He wants, and I'm resigned to His will, but a part of me is still asking "why me", lol. I have lots of Catholic friends who are not only practicing, but quite devout, - yet I've never heard of this happen to anyone else. There are two questions on my mind... is Jesus really like this? why? and what if He wants me to be Orthodox after all?

Thank you!!

edit: oh I forgot to say one little thing.. about the sense of "truth" that I got while the "presence" was communicating itself to me... it was a very clear, cold kind of sense of truth... and extremely strong, almost violent... but I got a similar feeling a few times when I was tempted to believe heresies. I'll list them so you can see how absurd they are. I was tempted that the Incarnation is false, that God is not merciful, that Mary is not our Mother, that Mary is a goddess, and that God doesn't exist. hmm!! So I don't believe this "sense of truth" automatically. However, this time, there was also that "presence" of Jesus... it felt so much like Him, yet was so unlike Him in other ways (the anxiety, the forcefulness), I'm completely lost and don't know how to discern! I'm quite willing to say I've been deceived, but why did I feel similarly after Communion a few times...how can any demons attack me while I'm united with Him in the Eucharist?

[Patricia]

The Spirit of God is a spirit of peace. Even in the most serious faults He makes us feel a sorrow that is tranquil, humble, and confident. This is precisely because of His mercy. The spirit of the devil, instead, excites, exasperates, and makes us feel, in that very sorrow, anger against ourselves. We should, on the contrary, be charitable with ourselves first and foremost. Therefore if any thought agitates you, this agitation never comes from God, who gives you peace, being the Spirit of Peace, but from the devil.

~~ Padre Pio

[MarysLittleFlower]

Patricia, that is what I've always believed.... but I can't figure this out. The "presence" was "peaceful" in a way... even though it was so forceful. I think it was the sense of clarity and truth I got from it that made it seem peaceful. But when I yielded to it, I was filled with much anxiety (a physical feeling of anxiety).

It was a lot like God in some ways, yet unlike Him in other ways.

I hope Jesus helps me understand what this really was

[MarysLittleFlower]

I don't know.. is there some sort of infallible way we can tell if something is from Jesus? what does He give that the demons can't counterfeit? I think they can counterfeit His sense of power so I'm skeptical about my own experience.

[Patricia]

Maryslittleflower,  I feel you shouldn't give undue  importance  to these experiences. Don't dwell too much on whether it is from God or a demon. That way if it is from a demon you will not give it the attention it wants. If it is from God, He would want you to focus more on prayer and your faith, the Rosary , Communion, rather than the experience you are going through.

I will pray for you that you are given strength to triumph over these trials. If possible you must find a good traditional priest who will be able to guide you in this.  It looks like there is a wrestle for your soul . You probably pray the daily Rosary. Also get invested in the Brown Scapular of Carmel.  If you don't know how I will give you the details. Our Lady will protect you from all evil. God Bless you . I had a similar experience recently and called out in fear to St. Michael the Archangel. Pray the St. Michael prayer whenever you feel agitated or oppressed. Wear the Brown Scapular as soon as possible. Others on the forum may be able to advise you better as soon as they read your message.

[Shin]

Please don't just ask us here, but talk to a good and reliable priest at the very least. It's very important that you confide these things to a priest and keep them in the open.  

Every priest can be helpful, some will be helpful some won't be in these situations. I pray you have one who is so available. God will provide what you need one way or another.

Speaking just generally now: While we may reply to deep questions on these forums, we're only answering them as simple Catholic laypeople, not spiritual advisors or directors, or special folks whose vocation in this purpose, and we can only reply to what we know and are told.

'. . . if by divine dispensation the temptation has not departed, let the person who has it immediately without any regard for persons or shame return to her spiritual father or mother and mistress and say confidentially: "I say my culpa that I am strongly tempted to depart from this monastery and that I am not happy about this. I pray that you help me, that is that you put me in chains or in prison until this battle has ceased, so that I can persevere in the place to which God has called me." And in this way the one tempted intended that she should be held back when she was drawn to consent.'

St. Catherine of Bologna

I'll try to give my poor answer on some of what is involved in this. First I will address the doctrinal issue more.

But before I do that I want to say that this presence you that tells you to be Orthodox is not Jesus.

God never, ever, never ever, never ever guides anyone away from the Catholic Church. Never. This is the first rule of spiritual discernment, its true foundation. If the spiritual experience leads you away, the spiritual experience is not of God. Period. The end. No doubt about it. Ever.

If you're a person prone to doubts, engrave this in letters of stone on your soul. God's one, true Faith is the Catholic Faith.

Learn it, then let it be forever upon your soul, with confidence in God's revelation. It is your baptism, your confirmation, it is God's home for mankind here and in eternity.  

Orthodoxy has both schism and heresy as part of it, and so, yes the Devil would try to bring you into it, and yes, in fact the way that spirit sounds in many way reminds me of what one finds on some of the Orthodox hierarchy.

"Thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my Church." (Matthew 16:18) is a fundamental scripture that testifies to a historical truth, and it is on such objective truth that we found the Faith rather than on subjective experiences however spiritual. The Church Fathers testify to it, the scriptures testify to it, and the unchanging moral truths that the Church has not faltered on testify to it, and the history of the Church testifies to it.

We also have marriage that is indissoluble, as Christ taught -- unlike the 'Orthodox'. We reject contraception, another unchanging teaching -- unlike the 'Orthodox'. Among the reasons the 'Orthodox' split we read of a Patriarch wanting political power and authority -- ambition, pride -- these have to do with blindness and hard headedness more than any defense of doctrine. The lack of resolution of such other issues such as the filoque which are simply resolved are because these are used as excuses for schism, for independence and power -- that is the spirit behind the heresies and separation.

The devils will tell people truths to gain faith so that that they can tell people lies. It is a method. Always some good is used to achieve sin, it cannot be achieved without it.

There are many good tracts online about the primacy of Peter, the unbreakable contract of marriage, and so forth. By these clear signs, along with many others, along with the disunity and national nature of the 'Orthodox', we know the clear sign of the unity of our Faith.

It is out of the picture that Orthodoxy can be an alternative and the temptation of the Devil is involved in going to it, it is to be dismissed every time as that with complete Faith, utterly and completely.


"[Simon Magus] so deceived the city of Rome that Claudius erected a statue of him. . . . While the error was extending itself, Peter and Paul arrived, a noble pair and the rulers of the Church, and they set the error aright. . . . [T]hey launched the weapon of their like-mindedness in prayer against the Magus, and struck him down to earth. It was marvelous enough, and yet no marvel at all, for Peter was there—he that carries about the keys of heaven [Matt. 16:19]"

St. Cyril of Jerusalem, Father of the Church (Catechetical Lectures 2:19 [A.D. 350]).

"The Lord says to Peter: ‘I say to you,’ he says, ‘that you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my Church.’ . . . On him [Peter] he builds the Church, and to him he gives the command to feed the sheep [John 21:17], and although he assigns a like power to all the apostles, yet he founded a single chair [cathedra], and he established by his own authority a source and an intrinsic reason for that unity. Indeed, the others were that also which Peter was [i.e., apostles], but a primacy is given to Peter, whereby it is made clear that there is but one Church and one chair. So too, all [the apostles] are shepherds, and the flock is shown to be one, fed by all the apostles in single-minded accord. If someone does not hold fast to this unity of Peter, can he imagine that he still holds the faith? If he [should] desert the chair of Peter upon whom the Church was built, can he still be confident that he is in the Church?"

St. Cyprian of Carthage, Father of the Church (The Unity of the Catholic Church 4; 1st edition [A.D. 251]).

Now that I have addressed briefly the doctrinal issue, this post could go on ad infinitum with quotations of the saints supporting the One true Catholic Church, from the beginning of the Church to today, I'll try to deal with your question more on the personal level of the post.  

[Shin]

Well now, I want to say that first one is to reject the Devil and not let the Devil or his minions overwhelm a person's will. The demons can oppress the emotions, tempt with thoughts, but within our will is God Himself giving us grace to resist, and we can resist the temptations no matter how much they afflict us in the other parts of our interior life. So be of strong will, do not fold before this presence but fight it with your whole heart.  

Our thoughts, imaginations, all these interior parts are not our will, it is separate.

It is right that you not focus on extraordinary spiritual experiences like you have had but treat them less importantly -- this is because what pleases God is growth in virtue, not extraordinary spiritual experiences, which one can easily be lost in by giving too much importance to, and seeking after. Do not seek after them as answers to questions and problems!

You could very easily be lost spending all your time on these things and becoming less and less who you are supposed to be inside and out, and that would be of the Devil too. Consolations that are spiritual have a purpose, a goal, they do not exist for their own sake and nor do or should they always happen in the spiritual life, not for very long stretches of time.

Do not be caught up inside yourself! Look at your life around you.. and the virtues you must express there simply and honestly.

Now, your first experience with Communion.. one of the important parts of Communion is Faith, that is a Faith that does not depend on any spiritual experiences accompanying Communion whatsoever. A blind Faith because it is God Himself who has revealed the truth, it does not depend on what we feel or experience spiritually at all while going to Communion. He has proved Himself elsewhere, that the Catholic Church is His Church, without a doubt, so we can rely on the rest on Faith.

I do not know why you were put to the test the way you were the first time, but I know that one of the reasons why a person -could- be put to the test in such a way was the person either did not use this approach, or, using this approach God wanted to try it in the fire and demonstrate its virtue for the glory of God.  

The Mormons for example, depend on a burning in the breast for their spiritual confession -- and some of them do feel a real spiritual experience when they pray over their book. This is again, because of the Devil, and because of their wrongheaded approach to Faith, expecting individual spiritual revelations rather than conformation to God's revealed historical truth -- that the Catholic Church is the Church Jesus Christ founded, clearly evidenced historically and in the scriptures and Christian Fathers.

You must not use spiritual experiences like you have undergone to determine your Faith. The consolations of God in opposition to the Devil are very generous and kind of the Lord to have given you. Thank Him for them. Pray to Him for the strength to serve Him no matter what spiritual consolations you receive, admitting your weakness, and asking Him to shore up and help you all in all.

I am not a spiritual director, I am not someone who is capable of taking on a 'spiritual advisor' role, but I am a Catholic who can relate the basic truths of the Faith and who has to help as best he can, and so I try to answer posts on this forum of a personal nature when necessary.

I read in St John of the Cross, that the "dark night" is when God gives the soul more light than it can bear, and it experiences the light as darkness and feels absolutely rejected by God. This has actually happened to me a few times but at the same time I also felt great love for God,

It is good you felt great love.

We often like to relate to the deeper spiritual experiences and can too -- but I want to say that just looking at what you have told me so far, you are nowhere in anywhere near what is technically called the 'dark night of the soul' of St. John of the Cross. That's something far beyond a beginner, you have a good deal more to go through first.

At the very beginning of the purgative journey, learning the basics of the Faith, there are many trials to do with the basics.

Because you are someone who more commonly experiences the extraordinary than others (for reasons which we do not know yet, what is the root of it? understanding this can help) you need to learn how to handle this particular portion of the journey before you will be able to well proceed I am thinking.

Now I want to tell you a little about other people's experiences.  

While receiving the Eucharist, there is no guarantee of lack of spiritual warfare, on the contrary, you should not expect that you should be free of temptations and troubles in receiving Communion at all.

Moreover, when one receives Communion in Faith there is indeed union with Christ, but it is not perfect, because you are not yet perfect. So naturally, you can go through all sorts of trials and failings too. This is the experience of many people.

I just want to say that my impression is that you possibly rely far too much on turning towards these spiritual experiences in your life. That you very much must get over them and focus on the objective rather than subjective.

In this way will you be able to judge your spiritual progress in Faith, virtue, etc. If your Faith is locked up in improving these interior experiences, rather than improving your soul's virtue to please God, you will become easily caught up in fantasies and illusions produced by spiritual experiences and your own imagination.

The saints testify, and you should read of what they have to say about spiritual discernment in their works, that telling God from the Devil with certainty in spiritual experiences often cannot be done. And so, you must -always- put these experiences to the test, you must often treat them lightly and without letting them distract you, and you must -not- rely on them for guidance but instead revealed and objective truth, and you must -not- seek them out normally.

In so much as they truly contribute to the good, truly, well and good. In so much as they detract, let them be put aside.

St. John of Avila, St. Teresa of Avila, St. John of the Cross, St. Catherine of Bologna, their writings are easily available online and others about spiritual discernment and how to approach extraordinary experiences. The websites off here (see the 'website' button) have them. Learn what they mean soundly and fully when they speak about discernment, look up that topic thoroughly in the writings of the saints, and then adopt a right attitude with certainty that does not worry about offending God by testing them, and does not rely on them.

By relying on God and on truth, you are not relying on yourself, and so have surety. 

If you are a person highly prone to doubts or going whereever the wind blows -- or even if not, let me tell you, until you get over trying to prove the Faith through spiritual experiences, to test it this way, you will be tried by your doubts and lack of Faith until you fall. So, build the Faith on its foundation, truth, trust in this truth doubtlessly and all these trials will be nothing, a little dust in the wind.

I'll try to post some quotations of the saints on discernment later on. There will eventually, God willing, be a part of the website with concordances of saints' quotations on various subjects and this is one of them.

[martin]

Dear sister, any one who seeks God with a sincere heart will most likely experience those types of battles to a greater or lesser degree so if it be any consolation, remember that you are not alone but rather in the good company of all the saints who triumphed over such adversities and even greater ones.
I’d be very surprised if anyone on this forum hasn’t at sometime on their spiritual journey experienced such trials as those you describe and if not then most likely will do somewhere along the line.
After reading the replies above and the sound advice given I can only add the advice from many saints. That if temptations against the faith should ever arise a good practice is to banish them immediately from your mind and recite the Apostles Creed. In doing so you will put the enemy to flight and merit an even greater strengthening of the primary virtue of Faith.
Remembering your intention in my prayers. God Bless.

[MarysLittleFlower]

Thank you for the replies everyone!! they really helped. I'm always so afraid of being deceived or having illusions, etc, I think that maybe God allows this to happen to me to make me more detached and to have stronger faith - independent of feelings?

I agree that holiness consists in following God's will and having real virtue, not in spiritual experiences. I actually have a story about that... at first, when these things started happening to me, I thought that was evidence of something "special" in me so that made me proud. But then God helped me to see some of my sin and I saw I'm actually really sinful and weak, and have very little virtue if at all. I think now God gave me these consolations simply in His mercy, probably *because* I'm so weak and needed encouragement! And I still think I have very little virtue and too much pride. I'm trying to trust God that He will help me to overcome this during my life.

Today, I got the temptation again, as I was on the way to Confession. Then I found out that Confession is cancelled I don't know why... I really needed it. I'll try to go to on Tuesday because there's a really good priest that I want to talk to. Well so instead of Confession, I prayed before the Tabernacle. I still felt the effects of what had happened to me..... and it was so strong that it's like my mind was fixed on that "voice", and I couldn't hear anything else. For the first time in my life, it's like the Tabernacle was empty..I only believed Jesus is there by faith. I spent some time praying, and it felt like I was praying to emptiness but I know that's not the case. That just made me think that maybe the "voice" was not Jesus, since it made it so difficult to listen to Jesus in the Church and to even think of His mercy and love.....

I felt much darkness and anxiety for the next few hours, but then I asked Jesus for light and tried to open up my heart to Him. Something interesting happened, cause He didn't tell me anything about what His will is, but He did help me to want to do His will.. this gave me a lot of joy but it wasn't like an emotion, I just knew it was the right thing and from God (I mean the grace to want to do His will). So I just started praying that His will would be done in me, whatever it is. After a while of praying in this way, I felt alright that I don't know His will. I just need to be open and He will lead me in whatever way He wants, and if there's suffering along that way, that is perhaps needed to purify me. I know I need to be purified in many ways. After some time, I once again felt at peace with being Catholic, but I'm still not completely sure about anything. I'm just glad I have my faith back

You said that in temptation, God is still with us and gives us the grace to resist the temptation... that is true, but sadly yesterday I did give in to it with my will. Does that mean I ignored God's grace?

I see what you mean about having faith that's rooted in the truth and not in emotions/experiences! I guess my problem is, that the Orthodox have lots of support for their position too they always cite the ECFs, etc... but I do believe in Catholicism.

God bless!

[Bailey2]

"The doubts which arise in your mind do not destroy your faith; they only disturb your mind."  Bishop Cheverus to St. Elizabeth Ann Seton

Stay the course.

[Patricia]

'Also, it is not less necessary to keep a close guard on thoughts of the mind, since the devil sometimes puts good and holy thoughts in the mind to deceive it under the appearance of virtue, and after that, in order to show what it is, tries and assaults one strongly with the vice which is contrary to this virtue. This the enemy does in order to be able to entice the person into the ditch of desperation.'

~~St. Catherine of Bologna


'I will go peaceably and firmly to the Catholic Church: for if Faith is so important to our salvation, I will seek it where true Faith first began, seek it among those who received it from God Himself.'

~~ St. Elizabeth Ann Seton

Found these quotes applicable to the situation from Saintsquotes.

[Therese]

The Orthodox church isn't in union with the Catholic Church, the Church established by Christ Himself...Jesus wouldn't steer you away from the Church He established Himself.  That was not the voice of Jesus speaking to you, I assure you.

[MarysLittleFlower]

'Also, it is not less necessary to keep a close guard on thoughts of the mind, since the devil sometimes puts good and holy thoughts in the mind to deceive it under the appearance of virtue, and after that, in order to show what it is, tries and assaults one strongly with the vice which is contrary to this virtue. This the enemy does in order to be able to entice the person into the ditch of desperation.'

~~St. Catherine of Bologna


I don't really understand this quote! can you perhaps give an example?  

I haven't been able to go to Confession and I feel so much sin in me right now, and when I try to get closer to God, I can see it more clearly...I'm afraid that giving into temptations has really affected my soul, and also my heart, I always feel it in me even when I'm not tempted. I really hope that God would cleanse and heal my soul at my next Confession because I don't think I'm in a state of grace.   Sometimes I get really afraid for my salvation.   Nothing else has happened..I've been trying to not think about the church issue.

However, it's been giving me hope to think about Our Lady and to pray to her.

[Patricia]

I sent you a message about the quote.

[Shin]

I've started a thread on spiritual discernment with a guide from St. Ignatius of Loyola, read it and benefit from it I pray!  

I've never found it true that the 'Orthodox' have much support for their position, from my own experience, not with quotations or apologetics - I am saying this simply from my own experience in apologetics. They have a lot of misunderstandings about history, and often basic Catholic teaching -- that is the approach I have been exposed to. But history in the sources doesn't bear them out.

St. Peter's position and abundance in scripture is not a coincidence, and God is hardly likely to take the sign of unity and authority from His scriptures and oppose what He wrote and revealed there of it, by taking the man in the Chair of Peter and causing him to no longer be that authority and sign for hundreds of years. St. Peter the Rock, and then the successor of St. Peter failing for hundreds of years, falling into heresy? No. God does not oppose Himself or His scriptures.

There've been many times in my life when I've gone to Confession and found it canceled, and I have truly needed to go. I went again, later on, or if truly necessary made an appointment. Don't be too delicate about these things. Priests have emergencies that they have to deal with all the time as you know. People who are dying, who require last rites, many kinds of emergencies, and calls all through the night so they get little sleep.

If you take everything in your life that happens to you too personally, you will not be able to do much with your life. He does not bi-locate His priests too often.   Stiff upper lip! I know it's tough when it happens.

If God does not provide Confession at the time you first go, do further penance, make an act of perfect contrition, pray more fervently, and prepare well for it for the next opportunity.